My friend Syed is having a discussion on his blog Light Within about the intellectual growth of women, and I thought I would weigh in on the subject here on this blog to get your views too. Syed lives in Pakistan, and of course you know I live in the United States. I'm a firm believer in having dialogs with those in other countries so we can open up our minds to other ideas and beliefs so that we can understand each other. No hateful comments will be tolerated though, so don't bother leaving one.
Syed's article Intellectual Growth of Women is written from his point of view of women in Pakistan and gives an even-handed observation of how women there are growing intellectually.
Now, on to my own article with my observations on this subject.
Are You Intellectually Compatible With Your Spouse Or Partner?
- Do you feel equal in your relationship when it comes to intellect?
- Is there really such a thing as being equal in that way?
- Does it all equal out? Let’s address those questions!
In my opinion everyone has their own strengths and weaknesses. Some people have a hard time with what might seem like a simple task such as spelling. In my country it seems to me that there has been a sort of disconnect from my own generation that grew up in the 1950’s under a standardized educational system that taught everything by rote. You were shown how to write by printing, then cursive and how to sound out words so that you could read them correctly. Then, at some point, phonics when away and many in my son’s generation were not taught this important skill. They were just becoming aware of major learning disabilities like dyslexia too, which has always been a human learning issue but it took a while for teachers and parents to understand it.
From my observations I don’t think that people are so unequal in intellect as they are in opportunities to learn and grow. Some areas of the world afford their citizens an equal chance at education, but social mores and economic conditions relegate women to be stay-at-home mothers. That does not mean that women are less intelligent. It means that they may have had no choice to work, or they did have a choice and thought it was more important to be working at home as a mother and homemaker.
When I see how my own family and friends interact with each other intellectually it seems to me that if they are compatible emotionally they play off each other’s intellect as helpmates. One knows how to do most things on a computer and the other lags behind a bit. It has a lot to do with genuine interest in accomplishing something related to that need. That one who lags behind might know how to keep your car in top running condition though.
For instance, back in 1994 when we got our first computer I didn’t even know how to accomplish “copy and paste”. I had no one to teach me and so I had to learn a lot by trial and error all on my own. My husband was working as a pipefitter at the time and his job required him to accomplish detailed piping jobs on Navy ships. His training was more mathematical and hands-on, but very detailed down to the smallest measurement so that a system on the ship would be running at an optimum level. We both had the abilities to learn, but we absorb knowledge in many different ways.
My point is, I was able to learn many, many things about computer use, programs and eventually get to the point I am at now where I can do most things I need to do. (I haven’t tackled Excel, but if I needed to, I suppose I could learn that too.) My husband learned other skills and used them in his occupation. Together, we teach each other what we’ve learned as needed. Sure, we get exasperated with each other when we can’t explain how to do something, but I see that as a difficulty in communication and not the inability to learn a new skill. One of the issues that causes friction is that in this day and age we try to accomplish too much too quickly. That might be just a female observation though. I have noticed that many men seem to be in a “race” to get done first. I happen to be plodder, not a quick thinker. It’s important for me to finish, but I’d rather my work be complete and well thought out.
I think learning is a lifelong gift you give yourself. If you have the ability to seek out new information and learn, why not take advantage of that? Dialog with lots of different people worldwide is possible. We may find we have more in common than we have been led to believe.